They told you to be nice, respectful, and patient. They forgot to tell you how attraction actually works.
So you followed the script. You did what they said. You complimented her. You avoided conflict. You waited patiently for her to come around.
And it didn’t work.
If that’s ever been you (confused, frustrated, and wondering why the "nice guy" approach keeps backfiring), this isn’t just your story. It’s the story of millions of good men trying to navigate modern dating without a real map.
That’s why I brought Gracie Pleschourt on the podcast. She’s one of the fastest-growing dating coaches in the country and she works specifically with men. Not to turn them into someone they’re not, but to help them understand what’s actually going on in the dating world today.
And here’s what became obvious fast: most guys are approaching dating the way they were taught to, by people who never explained the difference between being nice and being desirable.
Women want respect. But they also want polarity. They want confidence, grounded energy, and a man who isn’t afraid to lead.
That doesn’t mean being a jerk. It means showing up with a full sense of who you are, your values, your energy, your direction. It means learning how to trust your gut, speak directly, and stop outsourcing your self-worth to her reaction.
Gracie pointed out something simple but powerful: most guys aren’t struggling because
they’re broken. They’re struggling because they’ve been taught to ignore the one thing that shapes everything else: their mindset.
Confidence isn’t about slick lines or dating hacks. It’s about knowing your worth, regardless of the outcome. It’s about showing up with honest intent, not desperation.
We talked about the fears most guys carry: of rejection, of looking foolish, of being too much or not enough. And how that fear keeps them stuck. Not because they’re incapable. But because no one ever taught them how to work through it.
So here’s what I want you to hear: You’re not bad at dating. You’ve just been given bad advice.
Things change the moment you stop trying to impress and start getting real. With women. With yourself. With how you show up in the world.
So if you’ve been burned, ghosted, confused, or friend-zoned—don’t write yourself off.
Relearn the game. Reclaim your energy.
The right woman isn’t waiting for a guy who says all the right things.
She’s waiting for a man who knows who he is.
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